DR WATTS VLOG

Use this area to post your character's blog posts. Remember this is IC and all posts should be written from the point of view of your character.
Post Reply
User avatar
J.Trimble
Sim Admin
Posts: 440
Joined: Tue Apr 19, 2016 4:04 am

DR WATTS VLOG

Post by J.Trimble » Fri Feb 10, 2017 3:50 pm

A video, of an apple plays on the screen. There is the sound of drills and saws and and cursing in the background. The time stamp on the screen climbs slowly, each second ticking away. A strange claw on a snaking arm picks up the apple, moving it closer to the camera, another claw comes in to point at the apple , pointing out one indistinguishable feature after another.

"See, A harmless apple!, go ahead and touch it, Steve!", comes a maniacal voice.
"Gee, I'm not sure, Dr Watt"
"Touch it!"
"Er, Hokay!", a pale hand reaches out for the apple, six legs and a pair of crab like pincers pop out and immediately snap at the finger of the hand. "yowch!"
"It's not harmless at all! Is it, Steve!?" said the maniacal voice "Behold, the applecrab!"
"Er...Shouldn't that be the crab apple?"
"The Applecrab!"
"Er..."
"Say it!"
"Applecrab?"
"Buhahahahahaha!"

User avatar
J.Trimble
Sim Admin
Posts: 440
Joined: Tue Apr 19, 2016 4:04 am

Re: DR WATTS VLOG

Post by J.Trimble » Sat Feb 11, 2017 1:06 pm

Another video. This time the display is that of a dart board.
"Do it!, Do it now, Steve!" Said the same maniacal voice from the previous video.
"Uh, ready, Dr Watt"
"Of course I am ready, Steve!!!" ,Boomed the voice with a great deal of irritation.
"Uh, oh,No I'm ready ", said -Steve- somewhat unsure.
"Then do it!, Do it now, Steve!", repeats the mad Doctor.

There was the sound of something being charged, the sound of a small surprised squeak just before a hamster bounced off the dart board and exploded just before leaving the confines of the screen. It wasn't a bloody or pulpy type of explosion, it was the full fiery ignition and explosive light show associated with hand grenades.

"Now do it, full auto!" Said the Doc in a low menacing tone.
There was that sound of charging again, a chorus of fearful squeaks and then the inevitable hamster bombardment and subsequent explosions.
"HUZZAH!", boomed Dr Watt. "Reload and do it again!"
"Uh, but she's out .."
"Then you'll just have to inseminate her again, won't you, Steve!"
"Oh... Not again.."
"Yes, Again!, buhahahaha!"
The camera panned to a hamster the size of a pig, it was wearing a garter belt and was in a cage. The assistant Steve cautiously approached the cage, a disco ball illuminated the room and a heart shaped bed popped out of the wall of the cage accompanied by the opening bars of Marvin Gaye's -Let's get it on-

*static, end of video*

User avatar
J.Trimble
Sim Admin
Posts: 440
Joined: Tue Apr 19, 2016 4:04 am

Re: DR WATTS VLOG

Post by J.Trimble » Wed Feb 15, 2017 4:24 pm

*Handheld video footage looking at Dr Watt's visage, The Doctor began to speak*
"Now Steve, I want you to find the remote for the television"
"Uh, Ok Doc.."
"Its inside me, Steve!"
"Uh.."
"Oh just shut the fuck up and get in there, Steve!"
"In where?" Asked -Steve-, as the Dr opened a panel on the side of her body.
"It's in there somewhere!", snapped the Dr.
"Uh, you want me to... get inside?"
"Yes, Steve, just pretend I'm your momma!, Buhahahah" The camera approached the hatch, and then suddenly it crash zoomed through it, with the sound of howling wind and screaming."
"Oh hurry up, My show is nearly on" Said a distant sounding Dr Watt.. Inside of Dr Watt, the camera view panned round, to reveal an entire star system...filled with planets and stars, as the camera spun helplessly out of control it momentarily showed the view of where it had come from...the hatch way in Dr Watt's body, this time from the inside. The distant Disembodied voice of Dr Watt, Spoke as a claw hand appeared at the Hatch, holding a television remote. "Oh never mind, found it!", the hatch closed with a slam...
"Er... Dr watt?" asked the floating Steve.... "Dr Watt?"
Somewhere, just outside this tiny universe the theme tune to Dallas played.
*Static, end video*

User avatar
J.Trimble
Sim Admin
Posts: 440
Joined: Tue Apr 19, 2016 4:04 am

Re: DR WATTS VLOG

Post by J.Trimble » Fri Feb 17, 2017 10:04 am

*video starts a phone rings and an answer phone kicks in*

"Hello, Dr What?.... Watta..Watt... We would like to interest you in this once in a life time opportunity to invest in DPPI Insurance, insurance." Said the voice on the answer machine.
"Steve!!" Said Dr Watt.
"Uh yeah?" Replied -Steve-
"Send the phone spiders!"
Steve pushed a button on the answer phone, a small hatch way opened in it, steve placed robotic spiders into the hatch, the land line cable bulged as they appeared to crawl through it.
"I assure you now is the best time to ..." The sales man on the answer machine said. "What the hell? Arrrrragh!, Spiders!"
"Well I guess we're not interested, Are we? Buhahhaahahahaha" Cackled Dr Watt.
"Arrrrragh my eyes!!!..." Screamed the voice on the other end of the line.

*Static, End video*

User avatar
J.Trimble
Sim Admin
Posts: 440
Joined: Tue Apr 19, 2016 4:04 am

Re: DR WATTS VLOG

Post by J.Trimble » Fri Mar 03, 2017 12:55 pm

*the video kicks in, a large vertical coffin filled with mist ,with a lid made of glass is observed*
"Turn it on Steve!", says the familiar tones of Dr Watt. There is a flash and the silhouette of a woman is observed. Lightning crashes and the silhoutte moves. The door opens slowly and a woman with a green tuft of hair steps out, she is grey, and has lines covering her body.
"BEHOLD" Dr Watt gleefully proclaims...
"Er.. What is she?", asked Steve.
"No, Watt is me!, She is Garlic Girl!"
"Er, ok.."
The woman/ living garlic woman stepped forwards.. eyes wide, bloodshot and tear filled.
"Buhahahahahahaah" Dr Watt cried out in glee.
"But, what is she for?", Asked Steve.
"NO..She's only one day, Steve!"
"I mean, does she have a purpose?"
"Oh yessssss", growled Dr Watt in a sinister tone.
"And that is?"
"To mate with Bread Boy!" cried Dr Watt, The camera whip panned to a male figure made of bread. Steve and Dr Watt's voices spoke over the image, as a heart shaped bed slid out of the wall and a disco ball descended to the tones of Barry White.
"Er, you did this to make Garlic Bread didn't you?" ,Steve said.
"Buhahahahahahaah" , Exclaimed Dr Watt. "Yes I did!, I -did- , Steve!"

*static, end video*

Post Reply