Hello fellow citizens. I am Hillary Heath.
We have all been through a lot in the past year. From discovering the world as we knew it was gone, including losing all our friends and neighbors and family, to living under the totalitarian rule of Shiva, to the fight for our freedom, and now the establishment of our own government, it has been a trying year for all of us. But we are here, and now the tough decisions need to be made.
Sir Jerry was pivotal in getting us here. His skills as a rebel leader were unquestioned. But leading a rebel military band of superhumans, and running a city full of real humans, are two different things. I thank him for his hard work in getting us this opportunity to run our own city, but he has already shown he is a general, not a mayor: From his blanket decision to release all prisoners, including the dangerous prisoner known as Elephant Man who murdered the parents of a family of four in cold blood, to his wasteful spending of our tax dollars on his wedding, where his security was so inept that two assassination attempts took place against him...including one from his own bride!
As for Captain Strong, he wants to fire the police department and re-hire them? Huh? While I can appreciate a mayor wanting to install 'their own people', a whole police department? And who will be maintaining security in this town while Strong carries out his grudge against Chief April Ciro, who has clearly done the best job she could with the resources given her under King Jerry's inept leadership? There are two words that describe Captain Strong: "dangerously stupid". My favorite part from the first debate was when Strong said, "I plan to resign almost immediately, or to simply have the position occupied and unused." A vote for Strong gets you...an empty chair!
Speaking of the first debate, Jezebel Onyx Weaver made a campaign promise to put all superhumans in a registry. So the person who saves you from space aliens to mutant basshoppers to giant squirrels...That person needs to put all their family and friends at risk just so Miss Weaver can get elected? Yes, superhumans take a big risk, especially when they attack villainous metahumans, who wouldn't think twice about attacking a superhuman's family or friends. If these superhumans go over the line, we have the Guardians to bring them in and hold them accountable for their crimes.
But enough about my opponents. If elected, I, Hillary Heath, promise to:
1. Ensure our police department is strong enough to ensure the security of our citizens, as well as our borders. Our security is my first priority. Chief April Ciro has done a good job, but let's make sure she has what she needs. If we need to hire superhumans, we will.
2. Keep taxes low. City services should be provided by citizens wherever possible, for their own profits...and NOT the city's profit. Eliminate as many city services as possible, and taxes suddenly become a minor inconvenience instead of a massive monetary burden.
3. Make sure everyone in Celestial City gets recognized as citizens. There are many of us who were not supposed to be in Shiva's lifepods at the end of the world. For those of us who have not been recognized yet, I will ensure all of us are recognized as citizens.
4. Say "NO" to stupid ideas, no matter how heartwarming they may be. My job is to oversee necessary government services. I am NOT running a charity. I am NOT collecting tax dollars from you to pay for cute kittens or fuzzy puppies. While we all love things like that, we can pay for that on our own dime, and not everyone else's dime.
5. Have a legal system any of us can understand. What good is a legal code if nobody can understand it? How do you follow laws you can't possibly know?
Please vote for Hillary Heath, and I will do my best to protect you, your finances, and your peace of mind. Thank you.
Everything you need to know about the elections in Celestial City
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